Find Your Bright Spots

One of my best friends always tells me to find the bright spots in life.  She told me that sometimes you have to look for them, but they are always there.  How right she is!  I have noticed that there are bright spots in every day--even the bad ones! Life is not a fairy tale. We do not live in a crystal palace.  We don't have servants who wait on us hand and foot and keep us relaxed. Things rarely fall into place.

Jacob and I took turns traveling over the weekend.  He took a gremlin to his parents while I stayed with a sick gremlin and then on Saturday we traded shifts.  Driving nearly 3 hours with a screaming toddler and a 7-year-old who gets car sick and is vomiting in the back of the van is no picnic. It didn't go according to "the plan," but we did it and we enjoyed ourselves.

Yesterday I woke up tired and cranky.  Nothing was going according to "the plan" and the kids were also tired and cranky.  Kaitlyn was into everything, tattooed herself with markers, and was climbing up the furniture like King Kong! The boys had gone momentarily deaf and couldn't hear me when I spoke to them. Miraculously, their hearing returned after I repeated myself (loudly) a third time.  It was one of those mornings where you say, "You need to put on your shoes," and your child just stands there with a confused look on his face.  "Shoes? What are those?"  We were running late for church so I didn't get to spend the usual amount of time on my hair and make up. There was one point where I had an urge to lock myself in the bedroom and just say, "Forget it.  We're staying home."  Nothing was going according to "the plan" so it was safer to just hide out for a while. (Right?) On the drive to church I realized that I also didn't eat breakfast. I turned and looked at my kids all dressed up for Easter, fed and happy and thought, "Well, that's what's really important."

We made it to church and Kaitlyn started fussing.  The boys started acting like crazy people . . . monkeys in a zoo, if you will. I don't pop my boys on the back of their heads and say, "Straighten up," but I won't lie, there are times I imagine it. We got Kaitlyn to the nursery and headed to the sanctuary to find a seat. Eventually one of my favorite people and sweetest friends sat down beside me and gave me the biggest hug.  It was a bright spot to my emotionally crazy morning and she totally made my day. The service was good, as usual, and Jacob and I hung around and talked to a few people afterward.

We all started walking to the door because Jacob and I needed to get Kaitlyn from the nursery and get the boys from Children's church.  Suddenly, I heard a familiar little voice shout, "Mama!"  I looked up and Kaitlyn was running down the hall with a giant smile on her face.  Her curls were flying and bouncing on her shoulders and her arms were out, ready to grab me.  I picked her up and she hugged me.  Another sweet person in our lives had not only brought the boys to us but had gone to the nursery and gotten Kaitlyn as well. (Another bright spot? Yeah, I think so!)

Life rarely goes according to plan.  It would be boring if things went exactly the way we wanted them to go. We get so focused on "the plan" that we forget about the bright spots.  It's good to have a plan, but it's nice to be reminded to stop and look for the bright spots.  Sometimes you have to look for them and other times they are so obvious--like a clown blowing a horn and dancing in your face! You just can't miss them!  Let's make our plans, but let's not get so caught up in them that we miss the clown, er, um . . . bright spots!

Why Do You Think Your Children Are So Special?

"Why do you post so many pictures of your kids?"

"You talk about your kids too much!"

"Why are you posting so many pictures of yourself with your kids?"

Mothers want to brag about their children. Mothers want to share their children's accomplishments and talk about how proud their children make them.  Every mother wants to share funny stories about their children. Our children are such a huge part of our lives--it's difficult NOT to share them with friends and family.

On New Year's Eve Jacob had to take me to the ER.  After running some tests they discovered an issue with my appendix that could become cancerous and suggested I have it removed.  It was supposed to be a simple procedure--you know the drill, you go in that morning and are home by that evening.  Not a big deal. They ended up having to remove not only my appendix but also some of my colon and some of my small intestine.  I was in the hospital for 4 days and every day the doctor would come in and tell us that he still didn't have the results from the biopsy.  I was sent home and was told I couldn't get the results until my appointment because they wouldn't give that information over the phone. That week was one of the longest weeks of my life. We just wanted to know if it was benign or not.  It was simple.  "What does this have to do with pictures?"  I remember thinking about my children and how you really aren't promised tomorrow and you need to make EVERY second count. We were finally told that it was, in fact, benign. We breathed a sigh of relief and said a prayer of gratitude and felt a little less weight on our shoulders as we left the doctor's office.  I had been challenged to take more pictures of myself with my children--not for me, but for them.  Years from now when I'm gone they will have all these pictures of me with them; reminders of memories from their childhood. Some one once said that if you have memories you don't need to take a lot of pictures.  Look at the expression on an elderly person's face as they look at pictures from their childhood.  Memories are wonderful, but pictures are a pretty good thing to have, in my opinion.

I also post too many pictures of my children and talk about them too much because all three of them have a bone disease.  All three of them have had surgeries and all three of them have more surgeries in their future. I remember Alex, in the first grade, having both arms in casts after his surgery and never complaining.  None of them complained. They took it, they handled it, and they were tough!  I have learned so much from these three gremlins.  All three have gone through so much more than I ever did as a child, that is for sure! They are strong.  They are determined and they are positive.  How could I not be proud and want to share with everyone who loves them?

Not only this, but my sweet Alex is a special needs child.  He has learned to live with Apraxia and Ataxia.  We watch him struggle to do simple things that other children his age (and younger) take for granted.  Sometimes he gets discouraged but for the most part this boy is positive and he rarely lets things get to him.  He never gives up and he always tries his best.  People ask him why he talks funny, why he smiles funny, why he has a hard time tying his shoes or riding a bike, reading, writing. He shrugs his shoulders and says, "This is how I was born."  At the age of 9, he is one of the strongest people I know.  He always tries his best and then he just takes life as it comes, good or bad, with a positive attitude.  I couldn't be prouder of him.  We have watched him come so far over the past 9 years.

I have been asked why I post so many pictures. "Your children aren't anyone special." The truth is, every child is special.  I have been given these three beautiful gremlins who teach me so much about strength and the power of a positive attitude every single day.  May we all learn how to be better people from our children!

Our Home

I have had quite a few people ask me about how we decorate our home. I know not everyone likes it, but not everyone lives here. ;) What a completely boring world it would be if every house was decorated the same way! We like older stuff, a lot of color and items that you don't find in every home. We also want our home to be a fun and comfortable place for our kids to grow up in.  So, for those who have asked, this blog is for you.

                            My gremlins' hand prints on canvases above our bed.

 Jacob's mom gave this pillow to me with pictures of all of us.  It is one of my favorite things!

                                                   The main bathroom.

                                                       Dining room

                                                      Living room

The boys' favorite hangout spot complete with an arcade game (not pictured)!

Of course, we can't forget about these three gremlins who add so much spice and laughter to our world! Our home certainly wouldn't be complete without them! 

A Princess Adventure!

I sat in the tiny chair at a tiny table.  I held a tiny pink cup and said, "Thank you," to my 2-year-old daughter as she pretended to pour tea into my cup from the pink tea pitcher.  Her purple tiara resting on top of a bundle of blonde curls as she smiled and said, "There you go, mama."  We pretended to drink our tea and she looked up at me with those big blue eyes.  A smile spread across her little face as she nodded and said, "Mmmm."  I, of course, complimented her pretend tea making and serving skills as I sat under my own sparkling tiara.

When I was a little girl I loved fairy tales. I didn't just love the castles, the knights, the tiaras; I also loved the adventure of it all.  My imagination soared as I ran through the trees in my grandparents' yard pretending I was a princess on a mission.  Princesses didn't just sit in the castle and yell, "Eek!" when they saw a bug.  In my mind, princesses could use a sword and stood up for themselves.  They got to have parties (because saying, "They got to have balls," just doesn't seem to flow like it should!) and tea parties, but they also went on many adventures and even managed to save the day.  There is no limit to the imagination.

Enter adulthood and the real world. Parts of our childhood fairy tales do come true, but it is never as we imagined.  The dungeon is now used as a time out spot for that child who misbehaved.  Tea parties have been replaced with juice boxes and quick snacks as we hop in the carriage and run to the village from one appointment to another. Somewhere along the way the pampering part of being a princess got pushed to the side and the adventure took over.

I sit in this tiny chair and watch my little girl happily have a tea party with me. I can't help but embrace the adventure.  Busy schedules, budgets, sick children . . . a mom's life in 2014!  Adventure is what got us to where we are today.  Adventure is what made us the women we are.  Adventure reminds us that while we ARE princesses, there is more to this gig than sitting on the throne!  We have to get our hands dirty, sacrifice pampering to pay for a child's braces, and trade our glass slippers for sneakers that can get us to all of our appointments comfortably!

To all of my mom friends out there, you ARE princesses!  Never forget that! Let's enjoy this adventure!

Wear Your Joy!

I had an interesting encounter today--a reminder of how quickly life goes by and how we should stop focusing on all the negative, stop being hateful to each other, and start enjoying every minute we have.

I was on the dairy aisle of the grocery store.  Kaitlyn was wearing her pink sunglasses, blond curls danging over them, and she was happily chatting away.  I was wearing my pink Chuck Taylors and laughing and chatting right along with her.  Suddenly, I heard a soft voice say, "You remind me of my wife."  I turned around and an elderly man was standing near me.  He was holding a shopping basket and had a few items in it. He smiled politely and pointed at Kaitlyn.  "She is beautiful!"  I smiled and said, "Thank you!"  He smiled at Kaitlyn for a second or two and then turned to me.

"I saw you over here with your short haircut and your pink shoes.  You are so happy just to spend time with your daughter--to be alive . . . " He paused for a moment and his eyes filled with tears.  "You remind me of my wife."  He paused again and looked down at the floor. "She liked for her hair to be short.  She said it was more fun and only the bravest of women would cut off their hair!"  He smiled again. "She liked bright colors and fun clothes.  She liked upbeat music.  She was always so happy."  I smiled and said, "Well, she sounds amazing."

"Oh, she was!  She was too good for me, I'll tell you that much. It was impossible to stay unhappy when you were with her."  He paused again and then looked me in the eye.  He lifted his hand and pointed at me. "You remind me of her.  You have that same happy glow about you.  It's very inviting."  I said, "Thank you."  He laughed and said, "You know, sometimes you see these women and they just look angry at the world.  I always stay away from them for fear that they may bite!"  He continued laughing as he watched people walk by us.  "I don't know why people have to be that way.  You only get the one life--might as well make it a good one!"

He said, "Well, I don't want to keep you.  I know you probably have some fun stuff planned with that beautiful little girl of yours.  I'm glad I ran into you today. Don't ever let anyone steal your joy. You wear it well!"  He smiled, waved to Kaitlyn and said, "Bye bye, beautiful girl."  Kaitlyn waved back and said, "Bye bye."  He turned to me again and said, "Thank you for taking the time to stop and talk to an old man!"  I said, "I enjoyed it!"  He smiled and said, "Aw, well, thank you again."

He turned and walked away.  What a nice reminder to find the joy in everything in life--not only to find it, but to wear it!

Get Healthy

There was a time when I would eat whatever I wanted.  I'd prepare meals that tasted wonderful, but were full of fat or unhealthy ingredients.  I would eat sugary treats every day, telling myself I earned them.  Looking back now, I can't help but roll my eyes, shake my head and think about how stupid it all was.  I was never really obese, but after my surgery I dropped 20 pounds pretty quickly.  I had to be careful what I ate because part of my small intestine was removed and digestion wasn't as easy as it used to be.  I learned that greasy and fatty foods were really hard on my system and at times, even made me violently ill.  I now know that this was the best thing that could possibly happen to me.  It really opened up my eyes. When my 6 weeks of recovery was over I put on my awesome kickboxing gloves and got back into the groove of things. Cardio kickboxing (which I love), hitting the punching bag, riding the exercise bike and even doing a little weight training.  Jacob and I did a complete overhaul of our fridge and pantry contents.  We still buy some goodies for the kids from time to time, but we no longer eat junk and we eat very few processed foods.  We only eat out on rare occasions and we avoid sweets, except for treating ourselves to York Peppermint Patties (my favorite) on the weekends. I have more energy, I feel much healthier than I did before my surgery, and I don't miss all that unhealthy food, at all. In fact, most of it just tastes gross to me now.

I had an appointment with my doctor on Monday and he said my weight was perfect and I was at a "great healthy weight."  He talked about how even if you're a little overweight it is so unhealthy. He talked about all the risk factors and how you might not feel unhealthy but you are. We talked about how if you eat healthy consistently (Life style changes, NOT dieting) and exercise and get rid of the extra weight (and keep it off), you have more energy, you are more alert, and your body will be healthy and you will live longer and be more active in your old age. He talked about all the hidden risks with eating unhealthy food and how people will be overweight but argue that they're not.

I want to be healthy and now that I've had a taste of it, I like it.  This is our new life.  What's even greater is we're teaching our kids to eat healthy and exercise.  Eating in a restaurant or grabbing fast food is now a big treat for my kids because we no longer do it all the time. We feel younger, we feel healthier, we have more energy, all of those risk factors (diabetes, high cholesterol, heart disease, liver issues, etc) are no longer a concern because I'm no longer overweight.

It's a great feeling.  I don't miss the junk food and I'm happy with our new lifestyle and I LOVE that I have my doctor's support and encouragement!  Here's to a long, happy and very healthy life!!

Cherish Time

It's currently snowing outside. A scene that brings joy and excitement around Christmastime, but now, in early March, merely brings sighs and a longing for bright, warm Spring days.  We mumble and groan in disapproval, staring out at the gloomy sky from inside our warm homes.  Thick, white flakes of snow drift quickly to the cold ground, covering everything in a frozen powder. 

We missed church again this morning because the two youngest gremlins are not 100% well quite yet.  Kaitlyn was running fever again yesterday, has a horrible cough, is weezy and congested (hello, nebulizer!) and Logan sounds terrible and still complains of a sore throat.  The mom in me didn't have the heart to drag them out in the freezing cold sleet and snow, spreading their germs in the process. 

So, here we all are, like every other family, trying to make the best of it.  Jacob and I grabbed the New Orleans cook book and found a recipe for Chicken and Red Bean Gumbo that we plan to try for dinner. We have also taken advantage of this situation and spent time together as a family.  We stay so busy with the gremlins' schedules, not to mention our own, that sometimes it's nice to just sit and spend time together. 

It doesn't seem like that long ago Alex was a baby.  He is now 9, Logan is 7 and Kaitlyn is 2.  How did that happen?  How did time slip past us so quickly?  One day I will wake up, walk to the bathroom and see an old woman staring back at me from the mirror.  I hope that when I see her she smiles at me, happy with the life she has led--I hope she leaves a positive mark. As for today, I am thankful for freezing temperatures and icy conditions that keep us all inside, spending time together.  I enjoy listening to my children talk about their interests, their dreams.  Alex's dream of becoming a police officer one day in hopes of helping people.  Logan's dream of becoming a scientist in hopes of doing good and changing the world! Watching Kaitlyn walk around in Princess shoes, wearing a belt as a hat, carrying a little purse and wearing 20 different bracelets. "Look, mama.  Is pretty!"  

It is ALL pretty! Cherish every minute of it.

We are spending a lot of time here today--dining room table and living room.  This mom is loving every minute of it!