The Hunt

I don't know what I was thinking.  I guess I imagined a crowd of therapists shoving each other and begging to work with Alex as he stood with his arms crossed glaring at them trying to figure out which one to pick.

Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking.

When we moved to Perkins a month ago we said goodbye to Sensational Kids where Alex was getting all of his therapies. It is about an hour away and between gas and driving, waiting, and driving back with a toddler we just decided, albeit sadly, that we would find some one up here. Everything else had fallen into place and we were hopeful that everything with Alex would fall into place as well.  Honestly, I should have known better. Sometimes advocating for your child can be so frustrating when you are dealing with people who don't follow through on their end.  Alex has now gone a month without services and sadly, when he speaks, I can tell he has gone without therapies and quite honestly, I am frustrated.

I have called and been transferred and then transferred again and then asked to leave a message.  I leave a message and never get a return call.  I actually did speak to some one at a certain therapy clinic and they sent me paper work to fill out, which I did and sent back to them as quickly as I could (because my son needs therapy).  I was told that it could take a couple of weeks . . . so I waited three weeks and called to check on the status of his application/paper work. The clueless woman I spoke to transferred me and another woman informed me that they needed some information from Alex's doctor in order to proceed.  I sat there for a moment letting that sink in and then, in my nicest tone I asked, "Was anyone going to call me and let me know that this information was needed?"  The woman was silent and then apologized.

I had taken Alex to the doctor a week before we moved and asked for this information and was surprised that it was never sent.  So, I called the doctor's office and asked about it.  They took my information and said that some one would call me back.  No one ever did.

Perhaps it is my own fault because I honestly had no idea it would be this difficult to get my child the therapies he so desperately needs. I made one last phone call today and left a message (of course) and hopefully I will hear back soon and this person will be more eager to work with my son.

We haven't even touched occupational therapy, yet and I don't even know where it is available.  One thing at a time, I guess.  Until then, the mother in me is frustrated that it has been this difficult to find some one to work with my child. My sweet mother keeps saying, "Just be patient, maybe you'll find some one better if you don't rush into anything," and "At least this way he can get used to being in a new school and a new town and house before jumping into therapies again."  Very encouraging words from the woman who raised me--words that I needed to hear.

So the hunt continues and I know that eventually we will find the right person for my sweet Alex--and just like everything else, it will all fall into place.

Our Little Adventure

Front yard and part of the house.

The boys on Lovers Lane.  It's beautiful! 

Things have been busy here in Astleyland.  OSU contacted Jacob and said, "We want you to come work for us."  He didn't even have to interview--they just offered him the job.  They offered him more money and we felt a change would be a good thing, so Jacob took the job.  That same day we learned that there was a house available in Perkins if we wanted it. The timing could not have been better and we talked about how everything was falling into place and it seemed "meant to be."  With only 3 weeks to pack up everything, make phone calls and all the other 5 million things you have to do when you move, we made the decision that it would be stressful and hard, but we could do it.

And we did.  It was stressful. It was very stressful, but we did it.  I even managed to get Kailtyn's room painted before we moved in so we could have her room ready.  She knew something was going on but she wasn't sure what and she was having a hard time with it. We moved in around 8:00 on a Saturday night.  By 11:00 or so everything was moved in and our parents and brother-in-law, Dustin, headed back to their homes.Everyone was exhausted and sore. We had Sunday, which we used to do some unpacking and then the next day Jacob started his new job. Things just didn't slow down.

Once we moved in I could NOT stand the boxes everywhere.  Most of my time and energy went towards unpacking and cleaning and getting things organized.  Today, about two and a half weeks after we moved in, there are a few boxes in closets that need to be unpacked but for the most part we are unpacked. And things are going really well.

In the beginning I was not excited about moving.  I didn't want to move.  I loved Edmond.  We had friends there. I thought it was a nice town and I liked it there. It was our home. We had been there for 8 years and I couldn't imagine living anywhere else. I worried about putting Alex in a new school, but I knew that moving was the right thing to do. We have been here almost 2 and a half weeks and I can honestly say that I like it here.  I love this house.  I love all the space we have.  I love that it is NICE and looks nice.  I love the yard.  I love all the trees all over town, all over our street . . . everywhere.  I love how friendly people are.  I love my boys' teachers and the schools.  I love the old buildings and I love that my kids like it here too.  And, did I mention that I love this house?

Jacob's job is going well.  The boys are enjoying school (for the most part).  Kaitlyn is adjusting wonderfully to her new surroundings--she seems to like it too.  She LOVES the back yard.  We are still waiting to hear about therapies for Alex, but once that gets scheduled everything will have fallen into place.

It was an adventure and I can't believe we did so much in just a matter of weeks, but we did and life is good.  This place is just beautiful and it is teaching us to find the beauty in everything.  Confucius said, "Everything has it's beauty, but not everyone sees it."  In this place, where we are now, with all the good changes going on in our lives, we ARE seeing the beauty around us . . . and we're loving every minute of it!

Thank You

Over the past week or so I have received a lot of messages, texts and phone calls from friends encouraging my family and me and asking how Logan is doing. We started this journey with Alex and now two of our children have had surgeries, with more to come. When we went into this "surgery adventure" with Logan we were told there could be nerve damage or paralysis.  We were so thankful when he came out of surgery and was moving his hand. During his follow up appointment yesterday the doctor asked him if he could feel it when he touched his arm. He could.  So many prayers were answered--There have been no complications and Logan hasn't been hurting.

And still, friends are checking in.

I have had several friends ask me how I do it.  My answer to this question is, "I just do."  Encouragement and support from friends and family doesn't hurt. ;) A couple of friends even told me that as mothers they would have been a mess.  The truth is, when we went into this we knew that there was a good chance one of our kids would have this disease, but we wanted kids so we had them. Turns out all three of our gremlins ended up with it, but they are still awesome kids! I have seen them make people smile, I have seen them encourage friends, and I watch them, Alex especially, overcome so many obstacles. I can't imagine a world without them in it. It is so cool to see all the people in their lives--the many people who love them sending us encouragement, praying for my kids and for us, and contacting me just to see how "the little super hero" is doing.

So, what is the purpose of this blog, you ask?  It's purpose is to say, "Thank you" to all the wonderful people my kids have in their lives.  Thank you for taking the time to get to know my kids.

We love you all!

Go Write, You Writer!

I have a great deal of respect for books.  I am constantly telling my boys to take care of their books.  Break a toy and that's okay, but be kind to your books.  There is a whole world hidden within their covers, characters waiting to introduce themselves to you, and obstacles ready to be overcome in the most creative ways.  Let's face it, in a book or story anything is possible--the only limitation is your imagination.

I have been writing for fun for years. I remember in the 8th grade we were told to write a story about anything we desired.  The only instructions given were "be creative."  I wrote a story about a purple dragon. My teacher went on and on about how much she loved it.  I continued writing stories for fun.  In high school I realized I hated every subject except for English.  I loved the literature. I loved writing.  I was passionate about it.  In college I majored in English but ended up getting married, having children, and focusing on being a stay-at-home mom (Which I absolutely love).

A couple of weeks ago my friends all started "encouraging" me to try and get something published.  I was flattered that they liked reading the stories and blogs that I write but never thought I was that good--not good enough to be published.

Then, on Wednesday, I had the privilege of talking to the one and only Claudia Mills.  She is a very successful children's author and some one I have a great deal of respect for.  She told me she loves reading my facebook statuses and each one is a well written story.  She said I have "sparkle aplenty" to succeed as a published writer.  Wow, what an amazing compliment! She gave me advice and ideas, tips and encouragement. I have a lot of research to do and a lot of work to do.

I do not have a false sense of reality when it comes to writing. I know it could take years to get published, or it may never happen, but I would rather spend my time doing something I love and trying to get published than to not try and never know. I am excited about this new chapter in my life and can't wait to see where it takes me.

"You need to add 'Writer' to your occupation along with 'Stay-at-Home Mom'."
"No, I'm not getting paid for it so I'm not a writer."
"Do you get paid to stay at home and take care of your children?"
"Well, no."
"Okay, then.  What's the difference?  You write and you do it well.  Therefore, you're a writer. Now go. Go write, you writer!"

And that's just what I intend to do!

A Scene of Bullies

As we were walking out to the van this morning I heard laughter followed by some foul language.  I stopped. My boys stopped. We all turned and looked across the street.  Several teenagers were taunting another teen.  She was wearing a long skirt, a hoody, and Converse tennis shoes. She had her hoody pulled up over her head, as if she wanted to hide--watching this all take place, I could see why.  A boy slapped her books out of her hands and the group continued laughing and taunting her.  She just stood there. It was like watching a play; a scene of bullies, except it wasn't a play, it was reality. The group eventually walked away, still shouting hateful things to the girl. My eyes darted from the scene playing in front of us to my boys.  Both boys were watching--taking it all in.

I watched Logan's face twist into a sad expression and he said, "Mom?  Is she crying?"  I looked at the girl and she did, in fact, seem to be crying.  She bent down and picked up her books from the grass they were now resting on. She took two steps in the direction of the group who had picked on her.  Then she stopped.

Again there was a little voice, "What is she doing?"

She turned around and took off running in the opposite direction.  My boys watched her run until she was out of site.  Alex looked at me and held my gaze.  He said, "Is that how teenagers are?" I said, "Some."  Logan said, "That makes me feel sad."  Alex said, "Yeah, she didn't do anything and they were mean."  I said, "Well, remember this day if you ever feel the urge to be mean to some one, okay?"  Alex said, "Okay.  I would never want to make anyone feel bad."  He opened the van door, tossed his back pack inside, and climbed in.

I put Kaitlyn in her car seat and buckled her in.  I turned around to find Logan still standing there, staring at the place where the teenagers had been.  I said, "Logan! Come on, bubby, I need to get you to school."  He turned and started walking toward the van.  I could tell he was bothered by what he had seen.  He said, "Do you think that girl will be okay?"  I said, "I hope so."  He said, "When I'm a teenager I'm not going to be mean to people. I want everyone to be happy and be nice."  I said, "I know.  The world could learn a lot from you."  He looked up at me and said,  "The world needs more people who say good things and less people who say mean things."  He paused and then he said something that really made me think.

"Maybe some one today will say one nice thing to her.  I bet she'd like that."

He climbed in the van and closed the door.

Take a child's advice and say one nice thing to some one today.  You never know, it could make all the difference!

Not Most People

I watched her run across the parking lot.  I noticed something fall out of her pocket as she hurried to her vehicle. As I got closer I realized it was money.  I picked it up and hurried after her.  She was about to close her car door when I said, "Excuse me, but you dropped this."  She said, "What?" I said, "You dropped this back there.  I thought you might want it."  She reached in her pocket only to discover that she had, in fact, lost her money.  She looked confused as I handed it to her. She said, "Why didn't you just keep it?"  I said, "It's not mine to keep."  She smiled and said, "That wouldn't have stopped most people."  I returned her smile and said, "Well, I guess I'm not most people."  She shook her head and said, "Rare. That's very rare." She thanked me, shut her door, and drove away.

Maybe we should all strive to be "Not most people."  See, I have this problem.  My problem is I want every one else to be happy.  I will put people before myself because I want you to be happy, especially if you're someone I love. Today, I have received so many emails, and texts from people complimenting me on who I am.  Let me just say that there is no need to compliment me.  This is just how I was made, I guess--it's who I am.

And I'm okay with that.  ;)

Little Reminders

You know how it goes.  You're running behind and for some reason, your children don't seem to understand (or care) what this means.  They are goofing off and are still in their pajamas, even though you leave in 10 minutes. You hear your toddler say, "Uh oh" and walk into the living room to discover she has grabbed her brother's cup of milk and (of course) spilled it all over the carpet.  To add to the craziness, it's raining.  Do I even need to elaborate on that last one?  Kids like to jump in puddles, getting their feet and clothes wet and muddy in the process.  The garage is a huge mess and your vehicles won't fit in there, so you and your kids are hurrying out to the vehicle in the rain.  By the time you reach the vehicle you can't find your keys to unlock it.  "Hurry, mom!"  By the time you finally find them, press the button, and your eldest opens the van door everyone is soaked. You get to school and manage to stop the vehicle right on a water puddle.  When your son opens the van door both back packs fall out and land right in the puddle with a big splash. The toddler is screaming, snot growing from her nose and oozing in all directions as you try to hurry your two sons into the school building because it's raining.

We have all had those days where, no matter what we do, nothing seems to go right.  Today, I am tired.  I am stuffed up, everywhere I turn in this house there is a mess--I don't even know where to begin.  Therapies, school, homework, birthday party planning, doctor's appointments, Logan's surgery preparations, bills, cleaning, laundry--the list goes on and on.  Today I am feeling overwhelmed.  I feel guilty for not spending more time with my children.  I feel guilty because I can't seem to stay on top of things and keep the house clean.

I am always telling my boys that, most days, your attitude can determine what kind of day you have.  Most days I have a pretty good attitude but there are days when you wish you had a reset button. So, for today, here is what I'm going to do.  I'm going to look at all these little stress factors and turn them into something good.  How?  Here's how:

1. I'm thankful for the bills because they remind me that my husband has a good job that pays for these bills.  The bills indicate things we have (and should be thankful for) that some people don't have--electricity, air conditioning and heating, a roof over our head, clean water, the list goes on and on.

2.I'm thankful for that pile of laundry because it reminds me that my family has nice clothes to wear.  Again, there are some people who don't.

3. I'm thankful for that puddle that caught my boys' back packs this morning.  It means it's raining and rain is always good!

4. "Don't cry over spilled milk."  Okay.  Let's be thankful for it then.  Yes, it was a mess I had to clean up, but my children HAVE milk to drink.  And when Kaitlyn spilled it, I just went to the fridge and poured some more into the cup as if it was no big deal.  It's sad what we take for granted.

5. I'm thankful for the stressful mornings of trying to get my gremlins ready for school and out the door on time.  It's FAR better than not having them to add this craziness to my life. ;)  Jacob and I wanted children . . . and children we have.

I have been talking to my boys about being thankful for what we have and each and every day we discover something new that we take for granted.

What are you thankful for?